Wednesday, January 12, 2011

How To Stop A Divorce In Its Tracks

If you find that your marriage is on the rocks than you are probably wondering how to stop a divorce. There are so many things you can do, but the exact steps you will take will depend on what the problems are in your marriage and how well the two of you will work together.

Neither of you can do it all on our own. You must accept that the two of you must be on the same page. If one of you is not sure that you want to save the marriage than it won't work. You have got to be sure that saving the marriage is the number 1 priority... for you both.

There is one very difficult step you must take, it must be your very first step... and it isn't going to be easy. You have to honestly evaluate if you and your spouse are both really willing to work on your marriage.

This is the problem many people will fail to acknowledge. There are many relationships that simply are not healthy and might be beyond repair.

It's extremely important that both people are willing to work on the marriage if it is going to be saved. One person can not do it all on their own, no matter how much they may want to.

If you and your spouse are not both equally engaged in saving the marriage, you may need to just move on. It's very common for one person to do more of the heavy lifting emotionally in a relationship. The other person will just allow themselves to be pampered and catered to simply because they know that they don't care as much as their partner about the outcome of the relationship.

This is a dangerous and unhealthy relationship. If you find you and your partner have this type of imbalance in your marriage the first thing you must do is to find a therapist and get some counseling.

If this is the situation, it is highly unlikely that the two of you will be able to make the changes that are necessary to save your marriage. You simply don't have the tools and more than likely the dynamic has been so ingrained in the two of you that it will be virtually impossible to change without help, guidance and support.

Now, if the two of you are healthy, grown up adults the two of you will have a much easier time of making your relationship work.

The two of you must have be able and willing to each carry your fair share of the weight. You must each be willing to face up to your own flaws and be willing to make the necessary changes. That is a tall order for many people. And to be honest, many people simply won't be able to live up to that much of a commitment.

If you find yourself trying to find ways to learn how to stop a divorce than the best thing you can do is to be honest with yourself about who you are, who your spouse is and what you are each willing to do to save your marriage.

1 comment:

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