Marriage Help

When it comes to finding marriage help, I have good news and I have bad news. The good news is that there are tons of resources that can help you figure out what to do to make your marriage better.

You have choices of books, courses, online and offline therapy and combinations of all of the above. There really is something for everyone.

The bad news is that there are tons of resources. How do you choose? How do you know which ones are good and which ones either don't work at all, or just may not be the best fit for you and your spouse?

When you choose a course of therapy, and a therapist, it needs to be a comfortable fit. If you go to someone who you don't like, trust or feel comfortable with, it is unlikely that you will open up about personal issues.

If you aren't comfortable and you don't talk about the real issues, how will counseling work for you? In most cases, it won't.

So be willing to take a small amount of time and find a counselor who is not only qualified, but someone you like, trust and feel comfortable with. That will help give you and your spouse the best shot at making things work out for the best.

If you aren't  (or your spouse isn't) that into the idea of going to a therapist, you still have options. There are a lot of books, videos, courses, etc. out there that will provide useful information on how to improve your marriage.

In a lot of cases, the do it yourself approach probably isn't the best, but it is better than doing nothing and watch your marriage unravel.

Another possible option is to try online counseling. This may be the best of both worlds for you and your spouse. You will have a qualified counselor working with the two of you acting as guide and referee, but it is done via secure chat, over the phone or by webcam so it may not be so intimating.

This is especially true when it comes time to talk about the really intimate and possibly embarrassing issues in your relationship.

Being able to get the help of a therapist and have the anonymity of doing it yourself, may provide the best combination for you and your spouse and may be the quickest method to improving your marriage.

I guess the one thing I want you to take away from this article is this: help for your marriage can come from many places and in many combinations.

No matter what you and your spouse are going through and no matter what your opinions about counseling are, you should be able to find something that you both can agree on to help you fix your broken relationship.

With so many options of marriage help available to you today, you don't have to continually just stand back doing nothing as your marriage crashes and burns. You can be proactive and work to save it.

Online Marriage Counseling

The internet is becoming more and more popular for all types of things. Today you can even get online marriage counseling. Why would you want to do that? Well, there are many advantages to going to the internet to get help with your marriage.

Of course, it may not be your cup of tea. You should also make sure to discuss this option with your spouse first. If one of you isn't comfortable with the idea of an online therapist, it won't work.

To make counseling work you both have to be willing participants and feel comfortable. So if your spouse is reluctant to try this type of counseling, don't try to push them. That will only add one more level of stress to an already stressful relationship.

Before you decide whether or not online marriage counseling can help you or if you think that this may be the perfect type of counseling for you, I've compiled a list of some factors that you should take into consideration.

Here are some issues to consider before jumping online for your therapy:

1. Going online for your marriage therapy can make it easier to work around tough schedules. If you and your spouse have uncertain or changing work schedules, it may be easier to get an online therapist.

You will most likely have an easier time of finding hours that will accommodate your schedule.

2. Since there is a level of anonymity you and your spouse may find it easier to open up about personal issues.

These are the very issues that may be causing the trouble in your relationship so if you don't open up about them and learn to deal with them, you will have a hard time making progress.

Not actually being in the same room with the counselor makes it much easier for many people to talk more openly about extremely personal issues.

Having this open dialog is one of the first steps to take in order to be able to resolve the conflicts in your relationship.

3. Online counseling can be done via private chat, webcam, email and even over the phone. Find the method(s) that you feel the most comfortable with and then find a counselor that can accommodate you with that method of communicating.

At the end of the day the most important thing to save your marriage is to find a competent counselor who you like and trust and who you feel comfortable enough with to discuss some very intimate details about your relationship.

Being able to "talk" to the counselor online is much less threatening for many people. That makes it easier to get to the bottom of the issues that are really bothering you.

No matter what type of counseling you decide to get, offline right in their office or online marriage counseling, it is important to be willing to truly open up and be honest. If going online makes that easier than do it. Without honesty you just won't be able to make the changes that need to be made.

Save Your Marriage Without Talking

There are books around today that claim that you can save your marriage without talking about it. You might be wondering, does it work or is it all a bunch of garbage?

Well, I can't totally answer that question for you but I can tell you a little bit about how to save your marriage without talking about it.

As a woman, I sometimes get frustrated with the whole "men don't talk... get used to it" school of thought. I'm not a psychiatrist and I don't know what, if any, chemical or societal things come into play.

To me, we are all intelligent humans who should be able to communicate on an equal level.

I feel like I can talk and stay calm and be rational (p.s. not all women go insane every 28 days either and to accuse us of that is more than a little insulting. Especially if you do it in the middle of an argument!), why can't men?

The premise behind the not talking to fix your marriage school of thought seems to be that men and women are wired differently. They react differently.

For example, if a woman gets scared by the way her husband drives he will view that as a condemnation of his manhood, if I understand this correctly.

Then he will get angry and cold or he will drive even more aggressively to "show her".  According to what I read, this response is conditioned into men from a young age.

Apparently, when a women says that "we need to talk" a guy hears criticism and shuts down or gets angry and defensive.

I actually experienced that first hand with my ex husband. His mom was a little tough (yes, I'm being diplomatic) and he just couldn't seem to get that I wasn't her.

No matter how carefully I tried to talk about things, no matter how carefully I chose my moment (no, it's not a good idea to try to talk when either of you is tired or has had a bad day) he just didn't get it.

So, I"m sure a lot of what my thoughts  on this subject stem from my own frustration of years of basically being ignored.

I don't pretend to know about all the "hard wiring" that goes on with a man but it seems to me that as women we get more than our fair share of society telling us how we should react too.

Now, I have two grown children and one thing I have always told both of them was this: after a certain age you have to stop blaming your parents. It is time to grow up and own your own issues.

Personally, I think that should go for men and women too. Women, try to discuss worries and concerns with your husband. Stay calm and prove to him through your actions that he can open up to you and be safe.

And men, don't go all cave man on us. For the most part, we don't like it. Stop letting your mommy, or society, tell you how you should respond. As long as the woman in your life right now is treating you well, you have no excuse.

So, if you want to try to save your marriage without talking, it's up to you. But personally I think that talking, if done constructively, is the best way to solve issues and feel closer to one another.

Marriage Counseling Advice

Want some marriage counseling advice? I'm glad you asked. It's important to find a counselor who is qualified, but what does that mean?

There is more to being qualified than just having a bunch of diplomas on the wall. Not all counselors, no matter what their diplomas say, are good.

They may have the "training" but that does not necessarily mean that they are good at helping people achieve their goals. It's as much about chemistry between you and your counselor as anything else.

I, and some other people I know, have gone to counselors who really didn't seem to get what they wanted. Others, have gone to counselors who really didn't provide much in the way of "support".

They would let their patient talk and talk (and for some folks, that's all they really need or want) but they never provided any real world tools that could help the patient actively make the changes in their marriage that they wanted to make.

Many people want those tools. They want specific things to do or say that will bring about the changes they are hoping for. This is one thing to consider before you start going to a particular counselor. What do you want from them?

Do you just want someone who will listen or do you want someone who can show  you some actual techniques (as opposed to theories) that you can start using right away?

It's important that you know what you want and find a counselor who practices in that way.

Another thing to keep in mind is that you need to know what you want in your marriage too. Many people will think that they want to save the marriage, and in most cases this is what they want, but only to a point.

What most people really want is to feel like they are loved and understood by their spouse. That feeling of being loved and understood is more important than just saving the marriage.

And here is where it can get tough, your spouse may not be willing to make the changes needed to provide you with the type of marriage you really want. In other words, it may not be in your best interest to save the marriage at all.

Tough to hear, I know, but it's the truth. You should probably try to find a counselor who isn't afraid to tell you the truth, even if you might not always want to hear it.

This scenario was played out by my sister several years ago; Her husband was extremely abusive to her and the kids. It wasn't any type of physical abuse, but it was severe and it was abuse.

My sister went to a counselor associated with her church. This counselor actually made her feel guilty because she had finally had enough and was ready to leave the marriage.

The counselor was so "stuck" in his religious beliefs that he wasn't able to help my sister at all. He was unable or unwilling to try to stay objective and consider what was best for my sister and her kids. All he could think of was that the marriage must be saved at all costs.

To me, that kind of mindless "let's save the marriage no matter what" type of thinking has no place with any counselor. I caution you to carefully look at any counselor before you hire them.

If they seem more inclined to be concerned with maintaining their own beliefs rather than helping you, run don't walk. Find someone who is not only qualified, but willing and able to help  you decide what is best for you. That is the best marriage counseling advice I can give.

Pre Marriage Counseling

Many churches require a couple to go  through pre marriage counseling in order for them to perform the ceremony. I personally think that that is a great idea, especially if the couple is very young.

No matter what your age, or your maturity level, it can be easy to get overwhelmed in the moment. You fall in love and you are so happy that you never stop to consider that it might not always be that way.

Pre marriage counseling, if done properly, can be a great way for both of you to make sure you are thinking things through and that you aren't just caught up in the moment.

It will "force" the two of you to seriously think about and consider what marriage is really all about. It isn't all "playing house" and having fun.

Here are some of the most common things that will be covered in counseling. Many young couples wouldn't  think about, or talk about, these things before they are married if it weren't for the counseling:

1. Finances. Not very romantic I know, but do you have any idea how many fights can stem from financial burdens and concerns? A lot. It is extremely important for the two of you to know how the other thinks about money and money issues.

For example, do both of you think that you should save a little out of each paycheck? If so, how much? What about who will do the bills? Do you think you should both do them or do you think just one person should be in charge?

These may not sound like much but they can really cause problems later in your marriage.

Oh and one word of advice: you both should be involved in the bills. What would happen if only one person did the bills and something happened to them? The other person wouldn't know anything about where the money was, life insurance information, etc. Share the bills.

2. What about your views on having children? Do you both want them? If so, how many? Should one of you stay home and take care of them? If so, which one?

If both of you have careers that are important to you, this can really be a big issue.

If you both love your careers and neither of you wants to be a stay at home parent, the time to discover that is before you have kids (or even before you get married) not after.

3. Roles of each other. If both of you work do you think the household chores should be divvied up evenly? Or does one of you still cling to the notion that housework is "women's work" and lawn work is "mens work"?

If you both work full time, how will you feel if the bulk of the cooking and cleaning still rests on your shoulders? More than likely, after a while, you will start to feel pretty resentful if you feel like you are carrying more of the burden.

Again, these are just a few of the important topics that need to come up before you are married, not after. Covering these un romantic topics early will help ensure no surprises later, and that is what pre marriage counseling is all about.

Fix Your Marriage

Since you are reading this article, it's a pretty safe bet that you are worried about the state of your marriage and you want some good advice on how to fix your marriage. Well, you are in the right place.

In this article I'm going to give you some "real world" ideas of things you can start doing today, right now. If you follow this advice you will and your spouse can not only fix your marriage but possibly improve all the relationships in your life.

Here we go:

1. Be realistic. Take a long hard look at you and your spouse. Do both of you really want to work on the marriage? Now is not the time for wishful thinking, it is time for a reality check.

If both of you aren't willing to make changes the odds of you saving your marriage are very low.

2. If you honestly think that both of you are interested in doing what needs to be done to save the marriage, the next step is to determine what to do.

In most cases, the longer a relationship goes on, the more resentments and bitterness have built up. Chipping away at all this "residue" will take time. But first you need to identify it.

That can be difficult. You see, no normal person goes ballistic because their husband left the seat up or because their wife burned the casserole ( a little annoyed and frustrated sure, but not enraged).

The over the top anger usually stems from something else entirely. It has been festering right under the surface and the smallest thing can set it off.

Identifying this festering anger and the real causes behind it will allow both of you to face the old hurts and anger and move on past them.

3. None of what I have talked about is all that hard, however it can still be helpful to find someone to guide the two of you through.

These emotional issues are like landmines, if you don't watch where you step they can blow up in your face.  A good counselor can act as a bit of a navigator and a bit of a referee. That may make it possible for the two of you to actually accomplish something worthwhile.

4. And last, but not least, learn how to communicate in an effective non - toxic way. Too many times the old hurts and angers will show up in your words too.

When that happens, the simplest comment can sound like condemnation and it can set your partner off.

No one likes to feel like they are being blamed or judged and if the two of you don't know how to communicate and move past the debris of the past, you will continually set each other off and nothing will get accomplished.

These tips will help you gain perspective and start making positive changes which will make it easier for you to fix your marriage. It can be done, get the help you need and keep a positive attitude and the two of you may just work it out.

Relationship Advice

Have you ever noticed that one thing there never seems to be a shortage of is relationship advice? Every time you turn on the t.v., open a newspaper or magazine or listen to the radio, there is an "expert" giving out advice on relationships.

For that reason, it might seem odd that anyone would have to go online to find some good relationship advice, but it's not. You see advice is just like anything else; it is only as good as the person who is giving it.

Just because someone is considered an "expert" doesn't mean they know what is best for you and your relationship. However, this is not an excuse for you to dismiss what you are told just because you don't want to hear it either. It is a fine line.

I firmly believe that we all know what we need to do (in our hearts at least) but sometimes we just don't want to do it. We often know when our relationships are broken beyond repair, but who wants to face that?

Instead we insist on beating a dead relationship and trying to "force" it to work. That is a waste of time and emotion. So, I guess that would be step one in any plan to fix a relationship: make sure it really can be fixed before you waste energy on it.

So, how do you know if it can be fixed? That is actually pretty easy, all you have to do is figure out two things: what is the problem and do you think your partner is willing to work on it with you?

If the problem is a serious one like abuse, it may be best to move on. If your partner is abusing you in any way it will take them quite some time to change, assuming they are even willing to change. In most cases you are probably better off just calling it quits and moving on.

If the problems are not so serious, the next thing you need to determine, with total honesty, is how likely your partner is to work with you on fixing the problems. No one is saying they have to do all the work, but if your partner won't work with you, you can't do it all yourself.

At this point you really need a gut check. It can be really difficult to face the fact that your partner is either too self involved or simply doesn't care enough about the relationship to work with you, but if that is the case do yourself a favor and move on. You will be happier in the long run.

Relationships can definitely be challenging in the best of times, but too often we stay in the wrong relationships with the wrong person just because we are afraid. Afraid of being alone, afraid of hurting someones feelings, etc.

But if you stay in that type of relationship, you don't really have a relationship at all, so why bother? That is the best relationship advice I can give you.

Marriage Relationship

To me, it's really sad how a marriage relationship can fall apart. It almost always starts off with such promise and before you know it, the relationship is headed for the rocks.

There are those that say it is inevitable, that a marriage relationship just isn't meant to last. Personally, I don't agree with that. I think a marriage can last and thrive.

I'm not talking about the couple who brag that they've been married for X number of years but can't stand the sight of each other. I'm talking about a strong, respectful, loving relationship that lasts through the curve balls life throws at us.

I absolutely believe that that type of relationship is possible but I also don't believe it's magic or that it happens by accident. I think that to have that type of relationship there are several key ingredients that need to be there.

Ideally, these ingredients will be there right from the start, but if not, both of the people in the marriage are mature enough to be willing to make whatever changes that need to be made.

Here are the "magic ingredients" that I think can make a marriage last forever:

1. You must be compatible. Sounds like a no brainer, doesn't it? But think about it for a minute, how many couples have you known that just are too different to make a relationship work?

Most of us can think of several couples right off the top of our heads who are obviously not compatible. They have different views on everything. They are constantly bickering and arguing over the simplest of things. Not compatible

People often get together for the wrong reasons; sexual attraction or just plain loneliness and desperation. When that happens no one stops to figure out if they are a good match.

If you want a happy marriage, marry someone you have a lot in common with. Someone you can like and respect and someone who will like and respect you too.

2. Learn how to be a grown up. Again, obvious, but too many people do and say such dumb things. Again, from your own experience, how many people do you know who just don't seem to be able to effectively communicate their wants and needs?

They will pout, whine, give someone the silent treatment, basically act like a child, but they can't seem to really communicate with others.

3. Try to jettison most of your baggage. Too many people just don't seem to be willing to move on from some past hurt. They keep hanging onto it likes it's some sort of treasured possession, it's not. Let it go.

If you keep hanging on to your old baggage you will inevitably keep repeating the same mistakes. Who wants that?

That is not the way to make any relationship work, especially a marriage. To make your marriage work, be an adult and marry an adult.

So, to make a marriage relationship strong and healthy, keep these things in mind. If you are already married try to make some changes and hopefully your partner will too.

What To Do After A Break Up

Relationships are filled with all kinds of ups and downs. Unfortunately, far too many relationships come to an end and result in a break up. There is no question that these situations can be difficult, but if you have recently gone through a break up then there is hope. It isn't always easy to figure out what to do after a break up, but things will go more smoothly when you go about it the right way.

Dealing with the aftermath of a break up isn't on anybody's list of fun things to do, but you can do things that will make the process easier.

1. Realize that both parties are responsible, to some degree, for the break up. There is plenty of blame to go around after a break up, but you also need to look at yourself to see what role you played in the two of you splitting up. You won't be able to get past the hard feelings until you admit your part in what has happened.

2. You both need a lot of space. It never fails, one of the people in the relationship will want to talk about the break up, and they will keep pushing and pushing and... It gets to be too much and this behavior only makes things worse. It can be confusing trying to figure out what to do after a break up, and you have to come to terms with a lot of things on your own; your ex does too. No matter how much you want to run back and explain or beg, don't do it right away.

3. Accept the truth. It is so easy to live in a fantasy world after a break up. People often act like it didn't really happen or that things really weren't all that bad. Denial is a big problem and will only prolong the pain and heartache that comes after breaking up. Being honest with yourself and what really happened is the key to moving on with your life.

4. Seek happiness. It may not seem possible right now, but you can be happy. The catch is that you have to be proactive and track down your own happiness. That not only refers to going out and having a good time, but also to finding inner happiness.

The question of what to do after a break up isn't always easy to answer. Let's face it, you're not going to feel all that great. You'll feel pitiful, deep down inside it hurts, you don't know what you're going to do and you may even feel that you just can't go on. But by following the tips that were just shared in this article you will be able to get on with your life and things will get better. Remember, a break up does not have to be the end; in fact a break up can be the start of something even better.

Marriage Quote

Marriage is a huge step in ones life, committing yourself fully to the person you truly love and vowing to spend the rest of your life together. It is a momentous occasion and something that you will remember for years to come.

Because it will be remembered for years to come, you should handle it with care. You and your spouse may not have the best memory, you may forget your own birthday, or what you had for breakfast, but the one thing that will be ingrained in your memory until the end of your days will be the day you got married.

You will remember every move you made, every thought you had, every word you said. And so will your spouse. This is why it is important to be careful what you say. Spouting off some witty and amusing marriage quote may seem like a good idea at the time, but years down the road you or your spouse may remember that and you will just be left going "oh god why did I say that."

The best advice you can get for your wedding day is to simply keep quiet. Odds are you will be incredibly nervous and generally when people get nervous they do or say things they shouldn't. So to make sure you do not make any memories you will regret, you should just keep quiet.

While it may seem anti-romantic to just go through the motions and say what you are expected to say, it ultimately is for the best. Marriage quote can be fun and you may think they will help alleviate the tension but you do not want to try and crack some joke only to have everyone stare at you with blank faces.

Your best man or bridesmaids may think you should say something, to pop off a witty quote here and there. And maybe you can, if that is your kind of relationship. But to be on the safe side you should just make it very clear that this is a romantic and life changing event.

While it seems a little corny, you should only say things that are sappy and romantic. Comment about how you never expected it to be this intense and amazing. Years from now you want your spouse remembering how excited and happy you were at your wedding, not some stupid marriage quote you said.

All though the reception and up until midnight make sure to keep your brain on a short leash. It is easy to get wrapped up in the excitement and the events unfolding around you. But if you can keep a handle on yourself and remain calm, you can make sure you do not do or say anything foolish or stupid.

After everything is said and done and you and your spouse are happily married, you can say whatever you want. However as long as it is the day of your wedding you need to put up a good show, so that you do not have any regrets down the line.

Marriage Seminars

One of the leading reasons for marriage is because you want to spend more time with your loved one. But as time wears on and the honeymoon wraps up, you can very quickly find yourself not having the free time you desire.

There are a lot of reasons for why you and your spouse may be unable to spend the time together that you would like. The two most common reasons being work related or children. These distractions can be impossible to ignore and so you are left devoting all your time to everything but the person you want to devote it to.

This is where marriage seminars come into play. A lot of people may think that these seminars are for people with bad marriages, and that their marriage is not bad. Well this is not strictly the case. These seminars are for a wide variety of couples, including those who are unable to spend time together.

These weekend seminars provide the excuse to get away for a day or two and spend time together. It allows you to reconnect with one another and re-ignite the passion that brought you together in the first place. Think of it like a little mini vacation for the sole purpose of resting your relationship and allowing it to grow stronger.

Marriage seminars are generally hosted by churches who like to stress spirituality and religion. However there are also seminars hosted by various psychological groups who use mediation tools to help you. The only real difference between the two are the tools employed, both strive for the same goal that is strengthening your marriage.

When you decide to go to a seminar and manage to free up the time to do so, it can allow all the distractions of your daily life to just float away. No more bosses or kids or deadlines, just you and your spouse.

Another great benefit of going to these seminars is the ability to meet up with other couples. Once we get married and have kids, we generally lose touch with our friends as we get so engrossed with our lives and day to day routines.

Just because you find yourself all grown up and have a family does not mean you can not still have friends. These marriage seminars allow you to connect with other people in the same situation as you, or maybe to even re-connect with old friends.

The ability to talk with other couples and parents, hear their stories and their triumphs, it can work as great motivation for you for when you return to the daily grind. We all know that there are others out there going through what we go through, but when you actually meet face to face and share personal experiences, it can hold new meaning.

Regardless of why you want to go to these seminars, and regardless of what tools they employ, the end result is always the same. The desire to keep your marriage going strong and to keep the love between you and your spouse are the end result that all routes are leading to.

Marriage Requirements

Getting married is a big step in your life. You are committing to someone you love, and are vowing to remain with that person for the rest of your life. However are you making sure to take in all the facts and marriage requirements necessary to make your marriage long lasting and successful?

Statistics show that upwards of 50-60% of marriages fail and end in divorce. The reason for this is because too often we run off when we are young and marry the wrong person for the wrong reasons. Love is a fickle emotion that grows and wanes, especially when we are young.

Just because you are madly in love now does not mean you will be in love in ten, twenty, thirty, forty years. It also does not mean that you are right for each other. Marriage is a big commitment and if you make it with someone you are not compatible with, you will just end up as one of those statistics down the line.

This is why it is important to understand what exactly you are looking for and what you expect to get out of your marriage. To help with this are several tips you can use as guidelines.

1. Have realistic expectations. While dreaming of the picturesque family setting in the suburbs with a dog and white picket fence is nice and all, it may not be entirely realistic. You need to understand what kind of person you are, and what kind of person your future spouse is, and you need to realize just what kind of life you will have together. If you can not see the two of you living the dream life you want, then your spouse may not meet the marriage requirements necessary to have a long lasting marriage.

2. Be independent and happy with yourself. Confidence is important. Having confidence and pride in yourself and being an independent individual is important for a successful marriage. If either you or your future spouse are clingy and needy and dependent, this will get old as time wears on and be a source of friction between you.

3. Be loving and loyal. A lot of marriages end in divorce simply because the two drift apart. If this is not what you want to happen you need to make sure you are willing to put in the time and effort needed. Your marriage should always come firs and you should always be loyal and loving to your spouse.

4. Be their best friend. Out of all the marriage requirements out there, this is probably the most overlooked. A marriage does not mean you can not be friends, far from it. Friends are people who enjoy each others company, can talk to one another, and enjoy being around one another. If you can not see your spouse as your friend, you can not see them as your spouse and partner either.

Making sure you and your spouse can be friends, enjoy spending time together, enjoy talking with each other. This is important to ensure the survival and success of your marriage.

Marriage In Trouble

A lot of people rush into marriage at a young age when they feel they are madly in love. The problem with this is that as they age and mature, their personality may change and they might end up not being as in love as they thought. Or worse, the person they fell in love with may not turn out to be the person they expected.

The fact that so many people rush into marriage is also why so many people rush into divorce. It is said that the divorce rate in america is upwards of 50-60%. Such a high divorce rate is simply because people do not take their marriage seriously from the start.

Divorce is not always the option, as a lot of marriages can be saved if both parties are willing to put in the effort. But how do you determine whether or not your marriage in trouble? There are several signs that your marriage may not be as good as it should be.

1. Detached. If either you or your spouse seem emotionally detached from the relationship. If they simply do not seem to care about what goes on in the marriage and show no intention to help fix it or keep it running. A marriage should be between two people who care about one another and want to work with each other. If one party simply does not care anymore, that is a bad thing.

2. More bad then good. Every marriage has it's problems and there are always bad days. The problem comes in when there are more bad days then good days. A happy marriage should have their bad days few and far between. If you are finding these bad days sprouting up all over the place, that is a sign your marriage in trouble.

3. Every conversation ends in a fight. You are two different people with different tastes, arguments and fights are to be expected. Even the best of friends will have their fights. But if you find yourselves fighting all the time over the pettiest reasons, this is because you are unhappy with your current situation.

4. Not spending intimate time together. Another sign for determining whether your marriage in trouble or not is how much time you spend together. You should enjoy spending time together and if you find it to be a chore to do so, then your marriage is in trouble. Hitting a slump is one thing, sometimes we simply do not feel like being around others. But if it persists and you consistently avoid intimate time together, this is a warning sign.

5. Abusive household. If you or your spouse is abusive then this is a big glaring red sign that your marriage is in trouble. Abuse does not have to be physical, which is why a lot of couples stay together despite there being abuse. Abuse can take shape in a variety of forms, one being physical. However verbal abuse can be just as hurtful as physical abuse and should not be tolerated.

Marriage Games

Any relationship can take a lot of work to make it successful. Relationships are not something you can just let sit idle and expect them to work right. If you do not put in the time and effort, it will fall through. This can be made even more difficult when dealing with a long distance marriage.

Long distance marriages can require even more work than normal relationships as you and your spouse are separate from one another. These types of relationships can put a lot of strain on your marriage which can make them difficult to deal with. This is why it is important to find ways to make them work, from simple communication to playing marriage games to keep yourselves happy.

However even with that you may be left wondering what exactly you can do to make it work. You still love each other despite the distance, so you do not want to let that come between you. To this end there are several tips you can follow that can help you overcome this distance hurdle.


1. Establish a clear line of communication. Communication is the single most important part of any relationship, including marriage. So finding a means to communicate over the long distance is imperative. It can be in any number of ways, from simple phone calls, to letters, to emails, to webcams, to VOIP. Using a variety of these methods can also be employed to get the most out of your talks.


2. Try to meet up. Nothing beats meeting face to face so you should try to meet up whenever possible. Some things simply can not be done adequately over the phone or via letters, marriage games and other activities are best done in person so you can enjoy each others company. Even if it is only for a short time, meeting up every now and then can make all the difference.


3. Create a hobby. Having a hobby the two of you can share is a great way to bring you together despite the distance as well as give you something to do or talk about. Typically it is best to find something you can do over the internet, as it is often readily available and offers a wide variety of activities. But do not toss out conventional hobbies as they are still an option as well.


4. Surprise. Routines can get dull no matter what, especially in a long distance marriage. So finding ways to surprise your spouse can be a great way to add a little spice to your love life. It can be something like a gift or unexpected letter. If you are feeling especially grand you can even go so far as taking a surprise trip to meet up with them.


5. Share moments. We all experience moments in life that we would like to share with our loved ones. Just because they are not there with you does not mean you can not share them. You can share videos and pictures of special moments as marriage games and make it a fun activity that can connect the two of you.

Can This Marriage Be Saved

When in a marriage you can face a lot of ups and downs, it is during these down periods that your marriage will be strained. If things continue to be bad you may find yourself wondering can this marriage be saved? A lot of marriages end in divorce for a variety of reasons, but the most common one is that the couple simply did not work out.

If you really want to save your marriage you need to take the steps to fix what is broken. If you let it just sit and hope for the best, nothing will happen. However if you actively try to make things work then there are some tips that can help you.

1. Communication. Communication is extremely important, but also one of the things a lot of relationships lack. Instead of openly talking with one another, one or both parties will keep their emotions bottled up and keep their problems to themselves.

The problem is that these emotions do not stay bottled up, and often erupt during arguments and fights. When this happens the other party feels blindsided and hurt, which just escalates the conflict. Instead of letting this happen, just talk your problems out.

2. Compromise. When wondering can this marriage be saved, one great method you can use to ensure it's survival is to simply compromise. It is something we are taught to do since childhood and it is the most important during a marriage. You are two individuals with individual thoughts and desires, so you will not agree on everything. This is why it is so important to come to a compromise so that both parties can be happy.

3. Keep calm and go slow. When trying to fix the problems in your marriage always remember to keep a cool head about you. Nothing will come from getting mad and screaming and yelling like a fool. Instead remain calm and in control so that you can make the proper decisions. As well, take things slow. If you try to rush and push your fixes, it will backfire and just make things work. Rome was not built in a day and your marriage will not be fixed in a day.

4. Forgive and forget. It is important to let things go in a marriage. You will always have your arguments and disagreements, what determines how much they impact your marriage is how big of a deal you make out of these arguments. Instead of clinging to past mistakes and fights, let them go and move on.

5. Set goals. When wondering can this marriage be saved, a good idea is to set you and your spouse some goals. having something to actively strive for can make it easier to fix what is broken.

6. If all else fails, see a counselor. If you have tried everything you can think of and your marriage is still spiraling down the drain, then seek professional assistance. Marriage counselors are trained to help couples reconcile their problems, so using them to help you out may just be what is needed to save your marriage.

Marriage Forum

Keeping your marriage alive and well can be really difficult. Statistics show that upwards of 50-60% of marriages end in divorce. The reason for this is simply because people rush into marriage. They marry young, when they are still learning and growing, and either the two simply grow apart or they find out that person is not who they thought they were.

However just because your marriage is suffering bad times does not mean you should jump ship. If you both still love each other, there are ways you can work to save your marriage. A lot of marriage forum and other media can give you tips to help you with your endeavor. This article as well has several tips you can follow.

1. Communication. This is an important aspect of any relationship that seems to get forgotten over time. We humans did not evolve with the ability to read minds. So the only way we have of finding out what is wrong is by being told.

Instead of bottling up your emotions and keeping all your problems to yourself, share them with your spouse and try to work through them. If you keep them to yourself you will end up unleashing them during a heated argument and end up blindsiding your spouse, leaving them confused and hurt.

2. Compromise. Compromising is something we were taught to do since we were kids. Different people have different views and will not always agree. When this happens try to come up with a solution that can make both parties happy. Some marriage forum out there have ideas should you be at a loss for what to do.

3. Remain calm and take it slow. Fights are a natural part of any relationship. However when they do sprout up try to keep your cool as best you can. If you lose your head you might end up saying or doing something you will regret. As well, try to take any fixes slowly. If you try to rush you can end up making things worse for your marriage.

4. Forgive and forget. We humans have a nasty habit of clinging to past grievances and holding grudges. Instead of allowing yourself to stoop to this level, try to forgive your spouse and let past mistakes go. Do not forget them as you need to fix them, however forget the anger and frustration they caused.

5. Set goals. People often times are very goal oriented, give them a set task to do and they will set out to do it. Many marriage forum goers will agree that this is a good way to help fix your marriage. Give yourself and spouse some goals to strive for in fixing up your marriage.

6. Counseling. If all else fails and nothing you try seems to work, then try going to a marriage counselor. Marriage counselors have a lot of stigma about them as it seems that only those with doomed marriages will go to them. However they save countless marriages every year and know what they are doing, and let's face it, what do you have to lose at this point?

Marriage Quiz

Marriage is an important commitment that can stay with you for a very long time. So it stands to reason that you do not want to be stuck in a bad marriage. But how exactly do you determine if your marriage is truly bad? How do you figure out whether or not you are simply in a slump, or if it is just down right bad?

There are a multitude of marriage quiz out there to help you figure out aspects of your marriage, including whether or not it is a bad one. There are some signs you can look for when trying to figure this question out. However above all of those is the fact that you are even looking at this article.

Simply reading this article and articles like it can be a sign that your marriage is bad. Typically, if it is merely a slump you would not immediately consider reading up on signs of a bad marriage, so that is why reading this can be a sign. There are more signs to look for as well.

1. Emotionally detached. If either yourself or your spouse just seem detached from your relationship. As time goes on and we grow up, we may find our attraction waning and this can lead to a bad marriage. If one of the parties simply stopped caring along the way, it can be hurtful and detrimental to the other party who is still trying and who still cares.

2. More bad than good. Another sign to look for on a marriage quiz is just how much bad and good there is. If you are in a slump that is one thing, all marriages have their bad days. But if every day seems like a bad day then there is a problem. The good should far outweigh the bad and if this is not the case, then that is a sign of a bad marriage.

3. No desire to talk. If you or your spouse simply do not feel like talking, this is a warning sign. This goes along with being detached, and is a sign of that as well. When you stop talking and find it to be more of a chore to talk this will put strain on your marriage.

4. Every conversation ends in an argument. Fights are to be expected, you are individuals who may disagree on things. But if these fights seem to pop up at every turn this is a problem. As well if the fights turn out to be especially vicious and cruel. As spouses and partners you should be able to come to agreements and keep your cool most of the time.

5. Not spending time together. The last warning sign in the marriage quiz is not spending time together. Being busy is one thing, but when it gets to the point where one, or both of you simply do not enjoy spending time together then that is a sign of a bad marriage and you should take measures to fix it as you see fit.

Marriage Definition

Marriage is a wonderful thing that binds together two people who love each other. However people change as time goes on, and if you marry young you may end up marrying that person for the wrong reasons. This is why so many marriages end in divorce.

People rush into it, they do not realize just who exactly they are marrying and as time wears on and that persons bad traits come to light, it is too late.

However despite this, many more marriages do not end in divorce. That does not mean those marriages are all peachy though. If you are looking for the proper marriage definition for determining whether or not your marriage is bad, there are several signs you should look for.

1. Are you detached. If either you or your spouse seem detached from the relationship, this is a sign of a bad marriage. Not all marriages end in some bloody divorce because things went horribly wrong. Sometimes you just find yourselves drifting apart once you realize they were not the person you thought they were.

If you realize that this is happening in your marriage you might want to take steps to fix it. Just because one of you is feeling detached does not mean you should run and file a divorce, sometimes stress and other problems arise, if it can be fixed then it should be fixed.

2. More good than bad. When looking for a marriage definition and trying to determine just where your marriage stands, you should look at the good and bad. All couples have their problems and their fights, you are not clones and you have different personalities. But if you have more bad days than good days, you might want to re-evaluate your relationship. The good should always outweigh the bad, if it is the other way around then something is wrong.

3. If you are unable to hold a conversation. Your spouse should be the first person you should be able to talk to. You should be able to share anything with them, if you find yourself unable to do this that is a warning sign.

4. Every conversation ends in an argument. As I mentioned above, every relationship has its problems. This is only natural, you will disagree and argue and fight. But if you are at the point where you are unable to even open your mouth without it devolving into a heated argument then you may want to take another look at your marriage.

5. Unwillingness to spend time together. This is a big warning sign when looking for your marriage definition. If you and your spouse rarely spend intimate time together, and simply can not seem to make time for one another this can be a big problem. In of itself it is a large problem that can threaten the stability of your relationship.

But what makes it even worse is that it can lead into other problems as well. Being unable to spend time together can lead to arguments and fights and put a lot of stress on your marriage. Whether it is because you simply lost interest in your spouse or other reasons, if you desire to keep your marriage running smoothly you should always try to put your spouse first and spend time with them.

Marriage Retreats

Love is a powerful emotion and can bring about a lot of happiness and good times. When you finally find that special someone that makes your heart race whenever you think about them, that makes you feel so good when you are around them, it is very powerful.

So it is no surprise why people want to spend their lives with the ones they love. But spending your life with your significant other is not all roses and sunshine. Marriage can be full of ups and downs, with stress building up and causing friction between you. This is why marriage retreats are so popular.

Vacations are always important, they help us unwind and work off the stress that has accumulated. This holds true for marriages as well. Sometimes you just need to get away and relax. Without the stress your daily lives bearing down on you, so that you can simply enjoy yourself and the time you have with the one you love.

But how do you go about choosing the kind of marriage retreats you want? With so many of these retreats out there it can be difficult deciding where exactly you want to go. To help with this there are several tips you can follow.

1. These retreats are not necessarily specifically designed for couples. A retreat does not have to be some specialized institution tucked away in the tropics. It can be anything that allows you to get away from the stress of your lives. It can be a cruise in the bahamas or up towards alaska. Or it could be going on a nice long road trip across the country.

2. You should try to choose something you can both enjoy. This seems like common sense but it can often be a point of contention as you both feel like you want to do separate things. You may want to go up to a ski resort whereas your spouse may want to lay out on some tropical beach. Choosing a location that makes you both important is imperative.

3. You do not always have to go together, either. When you think of marriage retreats you often think of both of you relaxing together. But sometimes the thing you need to get away from the most is your spouse. You can love someone all you want, but you can have too much of a good thing. Anyone with siblings will understand this whole heartedly.

So taking separate vacations and just unwinding solo can be just what the doctor ordered. It may be fun, it may be lonely. But regardless it will give you the alone time you wanted and will make you refreshed and excited to get back with your spouse. If you are feeling a bit lonely near the end of your trip and are excited about getting back and seeing your loved one, then you know your retreat did everything it was suppose to.

Whether you make it a big week long vacation or simply spending the weekend in a nearby town. Whether you go together or separate, getting away from the hassles of life and maybe even each other is an important part of keeping your marriage running smoothly. Without shedding off all the stress and negative emotions, it will just lead the marriage problems and that is never a good thing.

Marriage Song

Marriages are special contracts between two people who love each other, we all know this. But there are a lot of little things that sometimes get overlooked. Small details that mean a lot to us once we get married. These can take the form in a variety of ways from little habits we formed living together or something we both enjoy such as a marriage song.

Having these little things can bring a smile to your face when you are out doing something. How many stories have you heard about a couple being out somewhere and a certain song plays and they go "that's our song!" This happens all the time, both in the movies and in real life.

These special little momentos may be insignificant to other people but to you and your spouse they can mean the world. Having a special song to remind you of when you first met or when you first got married can be something you will remember for the rest of your lives.

These songs are not always chosen as often they take the form of whatever song was playing during that moment. However a lot of times no music was playing, that does not mean you should miss out on the fun though. Even if no song was playing you can still choose your marriage song.

The criteria for choosing such a song is entirely up to you and your spouse. But it should usually be a song you both like and hold a special meaning to the two of you. This song is a shared memory between the two of you and every time you hear it, it should remind you of the good times and how much you love one another.

So while the song itself is not that important, choosing it is. If you choose a song that does not hold much meaning to one, or both of you than it is not much of a marital song and will not hold the weight it should.

Throughout our lives most of us listen to a lot of music. We may have favorite songs, or songs that played during specific events. These are the types of songs that should be candidates for your marriage song. You can make a sort of list of all the songs that hold special meaning to you and then cross reference them to see if you share a song.

This may seem like a silly activity but that is the point. It is a fun and silly activity the two of you can share together, and it will be one more memory that comes to mind every time that song starts playing.

If by chance there is no song you both share then what the hey, wing it and just choose a song the two of you like. It's your song after all, who cares why you picked it. As long as it is the two of you making the choice together, that is ultimately all that matters. The song is yours and represents the happiness you enjoy together, so why you choose it is entirely up to you.

Marriage Restoration

A lot of marriages suffer problems for a variety of reasons. However the most common problems being either infidelity or the fact that the two are just incompatible. It is said that around half of all marriages end in divorce. While divorce is certainly an option, it should never be one taken lightly. There are other options available.

Should you be one of those people who are willing to try marriage restoration and save their marriage, there are a lot of methods out there you can try. While I can not list all of them, there are several good tips that can help you get on the right track.

1. Communication. This is the single most important part of any and all relationships, but also a part that is often over looked. Your spouse can not read your mind, they do not know how you are feeling unless you tell them. The problem is a lot of spouses out there keep their emotions bottled up and do not talk about their problems.

These problems build up until eventually they erupt during a heated argument, leaving the other party left confused and hurt by this sudden attack. Instead of doing this, talk to your spouse about your problems and try to work them out before they build into a powder keg.

2. Compromise. A big part of marriage restoration is the ability to compromise. We are all individuals and individuals have their own personal likes and dislikes. We all desire different things, and these differences can cause arguments and fights. Instead of letting these fights spiral out of control, cool your head and try to come to a compromise that can make both parties happy.

3. Stay calm and go slow. The biggest problem people face during a fight is that they lose their cool, they say or do things they will come to regret. Keeping a level head is important during a fight so that you can try to control the situation and minimize the damage dealt. As well, you have to remember to take things slow when trying to fix up your marriage, if you rush things too much they may end up doing more harm than good.

4. Forgive and forget. Everybody fights, this is just how it is. We argue about something, get mad, and it devolves into an outright fight. What matters is what you do after that fight, whether you you hold a grudge over it and stay mad, or if you forgive your spouse and move on with your life. It is always better to simply forgive and forget, and let bygones be bygones. Holding onto those negative feelings does not do anybody any good.

5. Marriage counseling. If all else fails, and every attempt at marriage restoration does not work, then you might want to try marriage counseling. This is the final solution if all your attempts fail, but this often is the turning point in a marriage. Marriage counselors are trained professionals who know how to help you work through your problems and salvage your marriage.

Marriage Encounters

Marriage is a wonderful thing that binds two people who love each other together. But as wonderful as it is, it also takes a lot of work. Both parties involved have to put in a lot of time and effort to make a marriage success, and it is very much a give and take relationship.

But what happens when those two people are separated by a vast distance? What happens when they are unable to be together for whatever reason? This is a brand new and unique challenge presented to the couple. Long distance marriages can be difficult since without the usual marriage encounters to help build up their relationship, it is far easier to fall through.

This is why it is important to take the proper means to ensure the safety and success of your marriage. To help you with this are various tips about making your long distance relationship work.

1. Establish clear communication. Proper communication is the single most important part of any relationship. This is all the more true when that relationship is over a long distance. Having the ability to keep regular contact with one another is important to keep you from drifting apart and straying from your marriage. Whether it is through phone calls, mail, emails, voip, webcam, or even a mix of these. Simply keeping in touch is the key.

2. Plan to meet each other. Marriage encounters are important and nothing beats meeting face to face with the one you love. So trying to find the time to meet up in person can go a long way to strengthening your relationship. It does not have to be a grand affair either. Simply seeing each other for a few hours is all it takes to keep that spark alive.

3. Build a hobby. Having something you and your spouse can share is a great way to keep your marriage strong despite the distance. The best choices would be something on the internet that the two of you could do together as you talk with one another. However this does not mean you should exclude more conventional hobbies, as those still do the trick as well.

4. Surprise them. Variety is the spice of life. Even in conventional relationships routines can get dull and boring, so offering a surprise every now and then can keep things refreshed and invigorating. It does not have to be anything major, a gift every now and then, or a fancy letter that explains how much you miss them. If you are feeling really grand, you could even take a trip up to visit them in person.

5. Capture moments. When marriage encounters are not possible, capture the moments that you would like to share with them. We all experience moments in life that we want our loved ones to share. Just because you are separated by a long distance does not mean you can not share these experiences with them.

Take photos or videos that you can share with your spouse, show them that they are still a part of your life and that even if they are not with you physically, they are still with you emotionally.

Books On Marriage

Statistics show that upwards o 50-60% of marriages end in divorce. The reason for this is because people are foolish and marry too young. They fall in love with someone in high school or college and rush themselves into marriage. The problem with this is that people change and mature over the years. The person you fell in love with may not be the same person down the road.

This is where a lot of problems stem from. However as many problems as there may be, as many changes as there may be, you still may love each other. It is during situations such as these that you may be looking for books on marriage that can help you fix your marital problems.

There are a lot of ways you can fix your marriage, with literally tons of tips out there. While I can not go through all of them, I can list a few to help you get on the right track.

1. Communication. Communication is the single most important aspect during any relationship. We have no way of know what is troubling other people unless they tell us. It is also the same way for them. If you bottle up your emotions and do not talk about your problems, your spouse will have no idea there even is a problem.

These bottled up emotions will end up surfacing during an argument and end up blindsiding your spouse, leaving them hurt and confused. Instead of letting this happen, just talk with them and try to settle your problems before they spiral out of control.

2. Compromise. Plenty of books on marriage will tell you that compromises are everything. You are two individuals, different people with different tastes. So you obviously will not agree on every single situation. Instead of arguing and fighting when you disagree, cool your head and try to come to a compromise that can make both you and your spouse happy.

3. Stay calm and go slow. Fights sprout up in any relationship. Even the best of friends will fight. The key is to not let these fights spiral out of control and ruin your marriage. Keep your calm and make sure you do not say or do something you will end up regretting. As well when you try applying any fixes to your marriage make sure you take them nice and slow, as rushing them can do more harm than good.

4. Forgive and forget. Know which hills to die on and when to make a strategic withdraw. Not every fight and argument needs to be some major production that gets brought up for months or years to come. Instead of clinging to past fights, forgive your spouse for any transgressions and allow yourself and your spouse to move on.

5. Marriage counseling. If all else fails, if tips do not help and all the books on marriage do not work, then you may have to try going to a marriage counselor. These counselors are professionals, trained to help you salvage your marriage.

Marriage Search

The divorce rate in America is high, upwards of 50-60%. With so many marriages failing it might cause you to worry for your own marriage. This worry is only compounded on if you and your spouse are having problems to begin with. Now days divorce seems too easy, a way to escape the hardships and pain of an unhappy marriage. But with it's ease also comes the fact that people may be jumping the gun.

Many marriages end despite both parties still loving and caring for each other. When looking at your marriage search for why exactly you chose your spouse to begin with. If you are truly unhappy and do not love them anymore, then divorce is a viable option. However if you still love them and want to save your marriage and make it work, there are some tips to help you out.

1. Communication. One of the main problems marriages suffer is the lack of communication. One or both parties keep their grievances to themselves and bottle up their emotions. This comes out during fights and the other party can feel blindsided, which just makes it that much worse. Being open with your spouse and telling them in a polite and calm manner when you have problems is important for a stable relationship.

2. Compromise. When trying to decide what to do with your marriage search yourself for the right answer. You are an individual person and so is your spouse, this means you will not agree on everything. When such disagreements arise try to come to a compromise so that both parties can be happy.

3. Remain calm and take your time. When problems do arise in your marriage it is important to stay calm and work through things slowly. If you allow yourself to get hot under the color you may say or do things you will come to regret later on. As well, being rash and trying to rush things can make them worse. So keeping your cool and taking it nice and easy when fixing problems is the key.

4. Forgive and forget. Do not make a mountain out of a mole hill. If you and your spouse have an argument over something minor, just let it go. One thing that happens a lot in marriage is one or both parties clinging to past mistakes or arguments and using them as ammunition in the next one. Instead of doing that, just forget about it, let it go and move on.

5. If all else fails, see a counselor. When you have tried every other option and you can not seem to keep your marriage from spiraling out of control, seeking professional help may be the only way. Marriage counselors are trained to help you marriage search and find, and fix, the problems you face.

It may seem like a bad omen if you have to go to a marriage counselor but that is preferable to divorce, and it might end up saving your marriage. However it is a last resort, so if you are able to take the steps to fix your marriage yourself you should try doing that.

A Divorce Book

A divorce is never an easy thing to deal with. While not all divorces are ugly and bitter, they can still be expensive and time consuming. And above all they can still be emotionally draining. However there are a lot of sources out there that can help you gain insight into a divorce to better help you deal with it.

A divorce book is one of the many ways you can learn about the details of divorces. Armed with that knowledge you can better deal with the ordeal and make better decisions. There are five main aspects you want to take into consideration during a divorce. These five things can make the difference between coming out alright, and getting swept away during a divorce.

1. You want to avoid getting your children involved as much as you can. As much as we might hate to admit it, divorces can bring out our ugly side and make us do things we would not normally do. During a divorce parents will often use their kids as weapons or battering chips. As awful as that sounds, it is a fairly easy trap to fall in.

Parents will try to force their kids to pick sides for two reasons. The parent wants some re-assurance during these troubling times, they want to make sure their kid still loves them. They also want to hurt their spouse which they feel is causing all the trouble.

However you must not let yourself fall to these petty emotions. Regardless of how bad your divorce is, you must work with your spouse to maintain a stable environment for your children.

2. Another thing you will often find in a divorce book is how to make proper demands. Divorces are all about both sides getting what they earned together. And people will often times use this as a chance to enact revenge by taking everything. Do not do this, instead try to ensure both you and your partner get a fair deal. If you are leaving on bad terms there is already enough resentment, you do not need to add to it by taking everything.

3. Communicating with your spouse is another thing you should avoid doing. Whether it is on good terms or bad, it is best to only talk through your attorney or when your attorney is present. This avoids potential legal problems down the road.

4. Also try to keep good records of various things. The main thing you should keep records on are your finances. Sometimes partners will try to hide money to keep their spouse from getting their fair amount. By keeping records you can prevent this from happening. You can also keep tabs on shared accounts so that your spouse does not try to take all of the money.

5. The last thing a divorce book might tell you is to always talk with your lawyer. Your lawyer is there to protect both you and your assets during these troubling times, so confiding in them and consulting them is important. Never take action without first consulting your lawyer so you can avoid making a mistake.

A Divorce And No Friends

A divorce is a very painful and taxing process with a lot of pitfalls to overcome. You will find yourself losing quite a bit in your divorce as your spouse seems to take it all, especially in a nasty divorce. They take your money, your house, they even end up taking the kids leaving you with next to nothing. But the worst loss of all is when you lose your friends.

For whatever reason when you get divorced your friends might start avoiding you and cut off ties all together. A divorce and no friends is exceptionally painful and just makes an already terrible situation even worse. There can be a variety of reasons for why your friends suddenly disappear once you get divorced.

Their marriage could be at risk and seeing you get divorced might scare them. People are afraid to face a harsh reality and would rather ignore it all, as they say, ignorance is bliss. So seeing you get divorced is just a glaring reminder of their own problems and it makes them think about getting divorced.

But by thinking of getting divorced they also think of what happens after a divorce, and that scares them. They are afraid of being alone and without money or even a house. So instead of facing this reality they instead get rid of what is reminding them of this scary possibility, and that would be you.

There is also the stigma associated with getting divorced. While it is not as strong as it use to be, getting divorced is still looked down upon by a lot of people. This can be another reason why your friends suddenly take flight, they might feel you should have stuck it out and made it work somehow.

Regardless of the reason, a a divorce and no friends is a very painful thing to deal with and can leave you bitter and angry. It can make you lose faith in the whole idea of having friends and make you reclusive and withdrawn. While it is perfectly acceptable to take your time to heal up after a divorce, you just have to remember to not stay that way forever.

Living well is the best revenge, so to get them back you want to move on with your life and find your own happiness. While it will be difficult and require determination, you can go out there and make new friends. There is no reason for you to remain alone forever.

So while the betrayal will hurt and just compound the ordeal of the divorce, it is not some impassable wall that will keep you miserable for the rest of time. Ensuring you do not let yourself remain down is the best thing you can do. Pick yourself back up and move on with your life.

A divorce and no friends is a painful and traumatic experience but it is not the end. It is a chance to branch out and experience new things and meet new people. As long as you do not let it become a permanent problem you will be fine.

A Divorce Choice

Divorce is never an easy decision to make in life. It is the end of your marriage and the end of that chapter in your life. It is not something to be taken lightly and requires a lot of thought before moving forward with it.

So how do you know if a divorce choice is right? Well there are a variety of reasons that people get divorced and if you are even reading this article you are probably contemplating getting a divorce. But before you do that you might want to stop and think of whether or not a divorce is the right choice for you.

Even though you might be contemplating divorce, it might not be the best route. Your marriage might be suffering problems, but could still be fixed. You need to reflect on your marriage and decide if it can be saved, or if it has already gone up in flames. There are several things you should look into when considering a divorce.

1. If either you or your partner has committed infidelity, this might lead to a divorce. If this has happened then you need to stop and think about what you want. If your partner has cheated on you, you need to decide whether or not you can forgive them or if it might be best to just end it there and then.

If you were the one that had the affair then you need to be honest with yourself and decide what to do. If it was a one time mistake, and you truly want to save your marriage then you should take the necessary steps. However if you truly have lost interest in your partner, then a divorce choice is probably best.

2. If there is abuse this might also be a reason for divorce. Whether it is physical or emotional, abuse is abuse. And an abusive relationship is not a healthy one. If you feel there is still hope you should take steps in resolving the issue. Try to see a counselor and work through your problems. But if you find this simply is not possible, then you should get out of your marriage. Staying in an abusive relationship will not do you any good.

3. If your partner is suffering from some sort of addiction that has a negative impact on your life, this can also be a reason for divorce. Whether it is gambling or drugs, addictions can have a negative impact on not just them, but you as well. If they refuse to get help or refuse to change, you should probably leave the relationship. Dealing with a person who has an addiction and refuses to get help can be very difficult, and is not good for you.

Regardless of why you want a divorce, only you know your situation. Nobody can tell you a divorce choice that is correct for you. Only you can determine which choice is best. Take a good long look at your marriage and whether or not it can be saved. However if you want out, then get out. Ultimately your happiness is what is most important.

A Divorce By Phone

In a divorce by phone you want to avoid as much contact with your spouse as possible. Communicating directly with your spouse can lead to legal problems since you might agree to something you should not have, or might have said something you should not have said.

You always want to talk through your lawyer, or make sure your lawyer is present whenever you do talk with your spouse. This will protect you and keep you from making a mistake that might cost you during the divorce. There is a reason the lawyer is there, and that is to protect you, even if it means protecting you from yourself.

There are other things you will want to take into consideration during a divorce. There are a lot of aspects of a divorce that can cause grief and stress. So avoiding those aspects is one of the best things you can do during a divorce.

Due to it's stressful and emotionally painful nature, a divorce will often cause people to act differently. A common occurrence is when children are involved. Parents will often try to play a sort of tug of war game with the kids, trying to force the kids to pick sides and turn them against the other parent.

A lot of parents will do this without even realizing it. They will let snide remarks slip out about their spouse, or generally just comment on how bad that person is. This effects the kids by influencing the way they perceive the other parent.

So even in a divorce by phone you will want to ensure you do not fall into this trap. It is exceptionally easy to try and force the kid to pick sides, and it makes sense and is understandable. In a divorce you are losing your spouse and your future is uncertain. So you want to make sure that your kid is there for you, and still loves you.

You just need to remember not to let that go too far. Childhood is a fragile time and even in a divorce you should do your best to give them a stable environment to grow up in. Even if your life is in turmoil you can still make sure that theirs is not.

Another thing you might want to take into consideration is ensuring you keep records of your finances. In a lot of divorces one spouse often tries to hide money to keep the other from getting as much as they should. By keeping records of your money you can prevent them from doing this.

You will also want to keep tabs on any shared accounts, or just close them outright. Just like you want to prevent your spouse from hiding money, you also do not want them taking all the money from your accounts and leaving you high and dry.

A divorce by phone is best since it allows you to avoid contact with your spouse and proceed a little easier. Every little bit that can help you get through the ordeal is good. Doing everything you can to minimize the negative impact your divorce will have on your life is one of the most important steps you can take in ensuring you can move on with your life and live happily ever after.