Stop My Divorce

Divorces are at an all time high. Some of the times it appears that it is easier to get a divorce than to get married.
People get hurt in divorce. The parties are forever scarred. Kids, if there are any, never get over the hurt. Knowing this, you might be wondering “How do I stop my divorce?”
There are 3 steps to stopping a divorce.
The first thing that you have to recognize is that saying you have changed doesn't mean you actually have changed. If you're the person who's at fault in the relationship, it is not enough to give lip service to the idea of change.
If you've been having affairs, for example, it's going to take time for your partner to believe that you're no longer going back to your wandering ways. It's not enough to tell your partner that you are not stepping out any longer. You'll have to take concrete actions. As an example, you might need to allow your partner to “monitor” your activities by checking in with him or her on a frequent basis. If your job requires you to travel, you might have to seek a new job that keeps you close to home.
Other things besides affairs can mess up a relationship. For example, if the wife’s spending habits are causing money troubles which weaken the marriage, she might have to commit to cutting up the credit cards and living on a cash allowance. If the husband’s work habits keep him away from home too frequently, he might have to commit to being home by 6:30 nightly regardless what. At the crux of this step is what is the most important thing in your life? If it's your marriage, you'll make the necessary changes. But do not just give lip service to them. Actions speak louder than words.
The next step is to avoid using emotional blackmail if you want to stop your divorce. Recognize that love is NOT enough to save your marriage. Telling your partner, “but I love you” in the heat of an argument won't win you any points. When you say “I love you” at inappropriate times, your partner is forced to say “I love you, BUT…” this weakens the emotional tie that love has between you.
Use the powerful “I love you” message when your wounds are mended, not at the heat of an argument.
You can not use logic or guilt to change your partner’s mind. Arguing like this will only involve a spiraling argument. If you feel you must win, then you'll lose.
Finally, do not think that you are able to win an argument. Some people like to use their superior logic or argumentative skills to “prove” they're right and their partner is wrong. This might work in a officially scored debate, but in a marriage (which is scored on emotions not facts) it is certain to fail. Rather than arguing, solve the problem. If your spouse brings up a fault in you, talk about possible solutions rather than argue back.
Are you wondering how to “stop my divorce?” Begin by following the “stop my divorce” advice I have laid out in this article.