Easing the pain of a breakup is never easy, but it seems as though family and friends are always quick to share their advice. They will say things like "it just wasn't meant to be" or "don't worry, the right person will come along." Yes, they mean well, but their words don't do anything to make you feel better. Good intentions are nice, but they don't mean much. What you need are some actual methods to start easing your pain.
Let's be blunt. There are plenty of negative emotions that come to the surface after a breakup. Everything from anger to sadness, and from guilt to uncertainty all mix together to make you feel awful. And those feelings don't even begin to cover the feelings of loss and heartbreak.
There is one thing that will ease the pain more than anything else, and that is time. You may have heard that "time heals all wounds", but it has also been said that "absence makes the heart grow fonder". These two sayings seem to contradict each other, but you have to trust that time will eventually heal the pain in your heart. Even if it doesn't seem like it's possible right now, you have to believe that it will be possible to feel better in the future.
The problem with waiting for time is that it, well, takes time. That all sounds good in theory, but you don't have time to wait. You want to start feeling better now. The good news is that you can.
Live your life - One of the hardest things to do after a breakup is living your life as if nothing happened. You need to go to work, pay your bills, and talk to your friends and family. The more familiarity you can keep in your life, the faster you will start to feel better.
Laugh - You may not feel like laughing right now, and that's okay. However, laughter causes the brain to release chemicals that not only make you feel better but also kill pain. Guilt can prevent you from wanting to fun, but giving yourself permission to laugh will help you to enjoy life more. Put in a funny movie, go to a comedy club, or watch funny videos online, whatever it takes to make you laugh.
Be realistic - Some people make the mistake of thinking that a breakup won't affect them negatively at all. The problem with this sort of thinking is that it doesn't let you deal with the situation. Instead, look at things realistically, and stop living in a fantasy world. You may have to confront some bad feelings when easing the pain of a breakup, but it's a necessary step to feeling better.
Seek help - If, despite your best efforts, you just can't seem to feel better, then getting help from an outside source is the answer. That source could be your higher power, a counselor, or a book on easing the pain of a breakup.
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