You do realize that no matter how badly you messed up and how much you hurt your wife, it still may be possible to reconcile things, right? It will not be the easiest thing you have ever done but it may be possible by doing an "advice for marriage search" on your computer. You just have to decide if you and she are willing to invest the time and make the effort to do what is necessary to fix what is broken.
If you decide that you can't really see yourself in it for the long haul, you really should consider letting her go so she can find the happiness she deserves. If you start down that road and then back off you will have only deepened the hurt by getting her hopes up and disappointing her further. So, make sure you have a good foothold before you even make the suggestion to her about an advice for marriage search.
If you are still reading I guess that means that you are willing to do whatever it takes to prove to your ex that you are a changed man and that you still love her and want her back. Hollow promises are not going to work anymore. It is time to man up and put your money where your mouth is.
Step one of the process is figuring out what you need to change. This may sound easy but it's actually one of the hardest things to do because it requires you to look at yourself with complete honesty and many times we do not totally like what we see. If you really want to get your ex wife back you need to figure out what to change.
If you're not totally sure what you need to do, just think back to when the two of you were married. What did you argue about? More than likely your ex told you the things that you said or did, or vice versa, that caused her hurt and pain. That is a great place for you to start. When she tried to tell you how she felt did you listen? Or did you get angry and defensive and feel like she didn't love you? That's a common response many people have. They somehow take it personally when their spouse tries to let them know how they're feeling. When your ex told you she felt a certain way about something, it's about her, not you.
If you really can't figure the problem out and you can't really find anyone to ask, you might want to spend a few sessions with a therapist. Most people find this prospect daunting. A lot of people won't admit it's daunting they tend to use terms like "It's a waste of time" or the think they do not need a "shrink" but in reality they're really just afraid to hear the truth. Anyway, a therapist can help you cut through all your own issues and will show you the things you need to see but aren't quite able to see on your own.
Remember, start looking online by doing an "advice on marriage search", this process really is the only way you can do what needs to be done to reconcile things with your ex.
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