Stop Divorces

There are no set in stone ways to stop divorces from happening. They happen all the time and some of them for good reason. But, there are ways to minimize the stress involved with them. Divorce is difficult for both of you and decreasing tension and stress is very important to getting the whole thing settled amicably.

First, just to let the dust settle, get some distance from each other. This will let things like anger and hurt subside and maybe let you both see things objectively. For the first couple of weeks do not have any contact unless absolutely necessary. Let cooler heads prevail so the next time the two of you meet up then you can have a civilized conversation.

At this time you can tell each other you still love each other but really, in the grand scheme of things that really is a mute point. Sometimes the "I love you's" really do not mean all they should but if you want to throw one in there every now and then I guess it can't hurt.

If you do let cooler heads prevail and then want to get serious about talking about how to stop divorces devastating, hurtful effects then do so. But, do it in a quiet setting that is conducive to keeping things calm so you can both remain rational and sane about what you really want to do.

Maybe it would help to keep a tally of each others reasons, like pros and cons, for staying married or getting divorced. These things, written down in black and white will help you both see where the problems lie and maybe even how they can be fixed. Not that it is the do all, end all but without all the BS between you, you might just be able to see that it is a relatively easy fix.

After sitting down together, if things are still up in the air, it might behoove you both to agree to get some outside counseling. Do not make the mistake of running separately to family members or even mutual friends. They will feel like they are supposed to choose between you and they also will impart on you their opinions of the situation which could possibly widen the gap between you. Find an impartial professional to help you sort things out.

A good counselor will encourage communication and help you learn how to be a couple. I think that is the biggest problem among married people who end up getting divorced. They never learned to be a couple and manage their lives together. Human beings are inherently selfish and one wrong slight can set you firmly on the path of becoming even more selfish and looking out for yourself instead of what is best for you both as a couple. Honesty, communication and striving to always improve what you have is essential in keeping what you have. A marriage, like anything worth having, is a work in progress.

If you do not want your marriage to become a statistic then put all your energy into repairing it so you can stop divorces destruction.