How Long Can Things Go Without Getting Back Together

If you have any hope of reconciling with your ex, how long can things go without getting back together? There is no one-size-fits-all answer. Some people can be apart for years and eventually find each other again. We've all seen tales of people separated for decades to end up married in their old age.

Chances are, however, you don't want that sort of scenario. In fact, your biggest fear is probably that your ex will be away from you long enough to find someone else. Of course, this is a possibility. And it's a hard one to face, but you do need to look at it head on.

The best time to work on getting back together is right away after the breakup. But not so soon that everything is too raw. Give each other a little time to settle into your individual lives and get used to not being part of a couple.

This might seem like bad advice, as if you become separate people and it will be harder to get back together. But by taking care of yourself for a while and focusing on you, it makes you able to be better in a relationship, too. It can help you look at your life and decide if your ex is really the person that you want.

It's very common to be afraid of your ex doing this and deciding they don't want you. Unfortunately, that is one possibility. But look at it this way. If your ex goes through this period of time and decides they do want you, then your chances of getting back together much better. And your chances of staying together are much better, too.

If you spend some time apart and your ex decides not to get back with you, you need to just continue to be the best person you can. Your ex will come around or then maybe not. If not, as painful as it is to realize, you're probably much better off without that person.

And if during your time apart you decide that you don't want your ex back, then you've saved yourself another mistake. Absence truly does make the heart grow fonder. So if a little time apart doesn't make you each want to be back together even more, than the breakup probably came with good reason.

A little time apart without the pressure of getting back together can help heal you both from certain situations. If there was an infidelity that caused the breakup, a little time and distance can make it sting a little bit less. It'll become easier for one to forgive the other.

So how long can things go without getting back together? It really depends on the situation and on each of you and how patient you are. It's a good test, to see if your future relationship can weather problems, too.

If one of you is impatient and tries to pressure the other at this delicate time, that's a good indication that you might have problems agreeing on other important issues in your relationship down the road.