Monday, October 12, 2009

Getting Back With An Ex Boyfriend After A Deployment - Where Do I Start

Getting back with an ex boyfriend after a deployment can be difficult but often worthwhile. Being away from family and friends tends to make a boy grow into a man, so you will probably find your boyfriend has matured a lot.
Depending on where he has been and how long he has been away, he may have gone through some traumatic experiences; as well. It is very doubtful that he will be the same person who you broke up with. It is best to start again as if you were going out for the first time. Take things slowly and get to know each other all over again.
You will have both have changed over the time you were apart. These changes may make you more compatible, but then again they may not. Only time will tell. You cannot base a relationship on just shared past memories. You need to find out if you both are the right match for each other now.
Don't rush into things. Enjoy each other's company. Pretend you don't know each other and go on date nights where you can chat for hours. You need to discover each other all over again and that is virtually impossible to do, if you are always surrounded by your friends and family. Go away for a couple of weekends together to see how you get on being alone. Have some fun and some adventures. After serving his tour of duty, I am sure that your boyfriend will appreciate some good old fashioned fun. Take him hang gliding, riding horses, bowling, roller blading or ski-ing. Whatever sport you can find near to you that you both enjoy.
Having a relationship with someone is not all about candle light dinners. It is about getting on together 24 hours a day through the good times and the bad. A successful couple share a deep physical and emotional attachment to each other. It is this bond that will get them through the hurdles; life throws at all of us.
It is worth mentioning that you are choosing a difficult path getting involved with military personnel particularly during these times. You must be prepared for long separations and perhaps for living abroad in military housing. Your man may be posted to dangerous parts of the world.
When you love someone it is very difficult to let them go and do their jobs. You must be prepared from the outset to accept the life they have chosen. It would be unfair to fall in love with a military person and then expect them to leave their carrer for you.
You also need to trust your boyfriend. Given his job, there may be things he cannot share with you either because of military rules or just that they are too painful. You will just have to accept this.
Getting back together with an ex boyfriend after a deployment may be difficult, however it should also be exciting and perhaps the start of a whole new life together.

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