Well, I have good news and I have bad news when it comes to fastest way relationship help. Which do you want to hear first? OK, the good news first: no matter how messed up your relationship might seem right now, it can be saved. I'm not saying it will be easy but if you are both interested in making things work, you will most likely find a way.
Having both partners on the same page is huge and the difference between success and failure.
The bad news is that it's rare for this process to happen quickly. It will probably take quite a bit of time for both of you to get over yourselves and find the love and patience it will take to work together and find solutions to your problems.
So, I guess you need to stop and ask yourself a question; are you willing to invest the time and effort it will take to identify and change the behaviors that lead to the troubles in your relationship in the first place?
If you can't honestly answer that question with a "yes" it may mean that you simply don't care about your partner or your relationship as much as you thought you did and it may be time to pack up and move on.
Even if you can answer "yes" to that question, your partner has to honestly be able to answer "yes" too. It's far too common for one partner to care more about the relationship than the other. The partner who is more interested in working things out will often be willing to do more of the work.
The problem is that this won't work out in the long term.
A relationship is a partnership and any good partnership needs to have a fair division of labor. If one partner works harder than the other, it will lead to resentment eventually.
Helping your relationship will focus mainly on identifying where the problems are coming from and how to fix them. This must start with the individuals in the relationship. You may fight over little things like not doing the dishes or forgetting to take out the trash, but that isn't the real problem.
I don't know what the real problem is but I know it goes deeper than these annoyances. The problem is, especially if the two of you have been together for a long period of time, it's sometimes hard to identify just what the underlying causes for all the resentment are.
It could be something(s) that happened years ago. Sometimes, this can be helped by enlisting the aid of a therapist or counselor. Having an objective third party help you both sort things out can be a real lifesaver.
You can go it alone or have someone help guide the two of you through the land mine that your relationship has become, either way you should know that you can pull it back from the brink and the fastest way relationship help just might not be that fast.
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It's true that sometimes the fastest way just doesn't work. Sometimes you have to choose between a fast method that doesn't work or a slower method that does.
ReplyDeleteBoth of you seeing and feeling things the same way is very important, it's true.
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