Showing posts with label repair your relationship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label repair your relationship. Show all posts

Friday, November 27, 2009

Advice On Sex To Repair Your Relationship

Being in a bad relationship is a tough thing to do. Nothing is worse than being married and lonely at the same time. If you think the best way to save your relationship is to 'spice up your sex life' you may want to think again. Here is some advice on sex to repair your relationship.
First of all don't buy into the old cliche that if you have great sex your partner will be satisfied and not leave. Unless your partner is an adolescent, or just acts like one, sex alone won't be enough to keep your relationship strong. A good adult relationship is made up of many components and until you can get it clicking on at least several levels, not just sexual, you will struggle and most likely won't be happy in the relationship.
A word of caution though, no one is perfect and no relationship is perfect. You will have times when you and your partner are not on the same page, and that's ok. It's more about balance, in your relationship as a whole you should be on the same page more often than not. If it's balanced the other way, where you are at odds more often than you are in sync you should seriously consider ending the relationship because the two of you just aren't a good fit, and that's unlikely to change.
So before you decide that hotter sex is the key to making your relationship what you really want it to be, consider some of these points:
1. How was your relationship in the beginning? Did you have a lot of hobbies that you shared together? What did you do, besides sex, when you spent time together? If you don't do those things together anymore, why not? If you analyze these changes in your relationship you will be a lot closer to figuring out what you need to work on to make your relationship strong again.
2. Have you asked your partner what they think is going on with your relationship? After all you're both part of the situation, and the problem. Why not share with each other what you are feeling, instead of complaining to your girlfriends, or buddies, why not ask your partner? No one will know what they are thinking better than they do.
Make sure that when you ask your partner what they're thinking you give them the opportunity to tell you how they feel in a 'safe' environment. What I mean by that is don't get mad and yell at them if they say something you don't want to hear. If you do then you are sending them a signal that they can't open up to you or it will get ugly, so they won't turn to you. That is the beginning of the end for many relationships.
Once they've told you how they feel, it's your turn. And the same rules apply. You have the right to express your feelings without being persecuted by your partner.
If you and your partner have reached a rough patch in your relationship it can be tempting to think that if you can reignite a fire in bed you'll be able to save your relationship, unfortunately that's simply not the case. Use the advice on sex to repair your relationship tips I've given you above to start to rebuild your relationship in a healthy way.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Save Your Marriage Infidelity Doesnt Have To Mean The End

Of all the things that may tear apart a marriage, infidelity is one of the greatest reasons. Extramarital affairs are a betrayal of all the things that marriage is supposed to be about. A marriage is supposed to be a union of two lives, two people bonded together for a lifespan, and breaking that bond is among the hardest things to get over.

In a marriage, infidelity Is not just what takes place when someone starts a physical relationship outside of the marriage. Infidelity could also be emotional, when one of the partners in a marriage starts to share their life with somebody outside the marriage.

This is called emotional infidelity, and it has become an even more serious problem in the last few decades. One of the reasons for this is because workplaces, one of our prime social engagements in present time, have become increasingly more mixed.

In addition to that it's even easier to communicate with people on the sly. E-mail and instant messaging and texting have all made it easier to bond with people that you should not be bonding with. While this is not the cause of emotional infidelity, it's a factor.

Simultaneously, physical infidelity has likewise become easier. We spend more time apart than we once did, and it's not at all rare to spend the bulk of time at work, which gives us a very handy excuse when we make the decision to cheat in our marriage. Infidelity is an option, make no mistake about that.

But the thing to remember is that all of these things are excuses and chances, not reasons. Changing the excuses will not change the marriage, will not solve anything. But that does not mean that you can not overcome cheating in marriage. Infidelity is a big problem, but it's not an insurmountable one.

The very first thing you need to do is to work out what went wrong in your marriage. Infidelity is not something that takes place in a vacuum; there's always a reason when things like that take place. Something has broken in your relationship and it needs to be fixed in order to get past the cheating.

You need to make certain that you do not blame the other individual. Yes, they cheated on you. No, it was not your fault. But you need to move past it, because playing the blame game will only delay the sort of emotional healing that needs to happen. You need to, as best you are able to, put it all behind you.

Once you have determined why and begin to work on it, you need to reestablish the trust in the marriage. Infidelity ruins trust, and it is going to be hard to fixing what was been broken. You need to work on rebuilding the trust. Do not expect it to take place immediately, and do not expect it to be simple.

But if you are able to follow these steps, you can save your marriage. Infidelity is terrible, but every relationship can be repaired. You just need to be willing to find the advice and the assistance you need to repair your relationship.